Three Myths about Advancing at Work

What would it feel like to step into your dream job? Not on some metaphorical level but in the day to day. On Sunday night you start thinking about what lay ahead in the week. Instead of your stomach churning with dread, you’re getting butterflies for all of the exciting and impactful things fill your calendar. You wake up Monday morning your head already abuzz with the activities of the day. You’re excited to collaborate with your team and work through some challenging and rewarding problems. Throughout the day you feel energized by the work you’re doing. You go home still on a high from the day making you an even better parent, spouse, friend. Then go to bed tired and ready to recharge for what the next day brings. That is what advancing in your career can feel like.

When you consider advancing at work though I’d be willing to bet that although a great day like that might be part of the picture, more creeps in. There is a little voice on your shoulder reminding you of all that will get in the way. Heck, for some of us that little voice is all we hear, and we can’t even get to the mundane magic of a great day in the right job of your tailor-made career. Our minds fill with the risks that could come with career advancement and what we tell ourselves are absolute facts that will come out of it. We tell ourselves that these stories we’ve heard are true and put them on loop until any story of those perfect days sound like a shadow that only exist for other people. If we aren’t someone like this, we know someone like this.

Anti Advancing Abby

Let’s take a look at Abby. Abby is a strong contributor at work. She has always been in high demand roles and completed pivotal work for her department. After years of leading projects and teams of people to accomplish results she is feeling a little stale. The work still requires her same skills and is challenging for her. She enjoys working with her team and coaching them to accomplish goals like she can. It’s just that she’s ready for a new challenge. Sometimes, Abby can feel herself getting disengaged at work. She doesn’t care as much about the success of the projects. She still wants them to succeed, but without the drive for exceeding expectations that she once had. This is spilling over at home too. When she gets done with work she feels drained and frustrated, which is not how she wants to kick off her evening hours with her kids.

Abby came to me to talk about how to get reengaged at work. I had to tell her honestly that based on what I was hearing, she had outgrown the role. It was time for Abby to move on and advance in her career. I expected to jump in and help determine her dream job and set up actions to get her there. (Similar to what’s available in taking the next step.) Instead, she laughed in my face. Abby told me she couldn’t move in her career inside or outside the company she was in.

The conversation went something like this

Do you know how many hours I’d have to work to learn a new job, a new culture, a new everything? I only see my kids in the evenings and weekends, I can’t fill those up with work. How would I get dinner on the table, finish the laundry, and hang out with them in that little of time. No, I’m better off staying here. It at least only comes up once in a while. Besides, who wants to start over. That sounds stressful. Honestly in this economy I’m just happy I have the job and the salary I have. It’s getting to be a struggle to pay for all the things. I don’t need to be stretched thin with a job that requires me to be there more, drive further, or maybe I don’t get paid enough.

I asked, what if you looked at advancing in your own company?

You have to already be doing the new job to be promoted here. I do not have time to do two jobs thank you very much. Besides, how would I even know what jobs to do or what to help with? It’s not like my boss would want me just running around doing everyone else’s work. I’m just grateful for the flexibility she does give me and I wouldn’t want to risk that. It’s not everyone who get’s to make suggestions for projects, coach and mentor teammates, and be one of the first to get asked for your opinion. I’d lose all of that if I went and did something else.

Abby isn’t the only one.

I would be willing to bet that you thought, well that makes sense, to some if not all of what Abby had to say. That is the problem with these stories, or myths, we tell ourselves. They become so engrained that they would appear to be true. Could those be risks of a job? Yup, they sure could. Are they a reason to not even consider something else? Absolutely not. Don’t forget, Abby came to me because she was frustrated, feeling stale, and her lackluster for work was impacting her home life. Leaving things as they are, is likely not the option. It is easy to feel stuck when you have these stories in your head. To move past them, counteract them with facts.

Counteract the myths about advancing with action

Any time there is a story in your head, be it about advancing at work or not, if it is holding you back, consider it a myth. Answer that myth with a plan and action to quash it and move on. This isn’t so much about talking yourself into believing something else, that will take time and a lot of intentional effort. It is about changing your behavior so that your thoughts will follow. Essentially, when that little voice shares a story, or myth, your response need only to be, watch me.

Your work life balance goes out the window.

It doesn’t have to. If you know you’re going into a new situation, job in this example, that is the perfect time to set some really clear boundaries. You can map out your ideal week and while not every week will go exactly that way you’ll be prepared to have a discussion with a hiring manager around what your expectations are. Whether it is I need to be done by 5, I will be taking off for field trips, I only travel 15% of the time, etc. Guess what, you’re in control. So, if you currently have a job that you’re successful in by following these boundaries you can use that as evidence that they work. If the hiring manager either doesn’t agree or the new role has different requirements, you can make a call on if that works for you. Or if you simply need to keep looking.

Your action is to create your boundaries. Click here to read 3 Steps to Set Your Boundaries to learn how.

Be grateful for what you have.

This one is actually true. Well, the words are but the meaning isn’t. So yes, be grateful for what you have and use it as a catalyst to move you forward. I am grateful for the experiences I’m able to have in this role, and I can’t wait to apply that experience in something new. I am grateful for the salary I have and if I was paid more I would be able to do more with those I love. You can be grateful for everything you currently have as perks in your role, and use them as a blue print for what you want to keep and what you want to double down on. Gratitude doesn’t need to mean that you’re indebted. It can simply mean that you’re grateful.

Your action is to take stock of what you’re truly thankful for in your role and how you’d like to see that grow or shrink in a future role.

You already need to know how to do the job.

You need to have experience in 60-80% of the requirements of the job. That is very different from needing to already know how to do that specific job. Get creative here. Understand your skills and capabilities from all areas of life. How does what you do in your current role apply to the new one? What are you doing as troop leader that qualifies you for that next step? How is your work within that non-profit, the PTA, or your church building the skills you need for your next step?

Your action is to build your resume to fit the job you want. No, it won’t be perfect right off of the bat. Taking the action will build your confidence and remind you who you are. If putting it in resume format is intimidating just start with a list. The point is to take some action.

If the idea of going from dispelling the myths to rewriting your resume feels like a leap but you still want to take major action. I am totally here to help. Check out the Get Hired Guide to get a copy of my E-book that walks you through everything from clarifying the dream job, making the right connections, building the resume (including templates with all the tips and tricks), preparing for the interview and so much more. Don’t worry there is plenty of encouragement and resources built right in to help you along the way. You’ve got this my friend; I’ll be here to support you and encourage you along.