Without Alignment, Even When You Win, You Fail

When you don’t have a plan you, you can’t hit a goal. When you do have a plan, an accountability partner, a structure, and realistic timeframe, you’re pretty likely to hit it. However, what happens when you hit it and you don’t really know why? Well, you’re less likely to actually feel the joy and accomplishment you wanted to feel when you set out to hit it. You’re more likely to move on to the next thing that may or may not work against the first goal you hit. Why is this? Because there is no alignment in your goals. There is no vision in the goals you’re setting. You’re an equipped, high achiever so you never committed it to enduring principles.

In this article from the Metro Voice, the author breaks down how Dr. Martin Luther King Jr pursued his goals. There were lots of reasons MLK could continue on toward his goal in hardship, but his enduring principles could guide the way.

Alignment with enduring principles, sounds heavy

OK so I get it, comparing your goals to get healthy, save money, get promoted, or even start that non-profit sound a little distant from the dream of racial and social justice for all people. That doesn’t make the process of how you set them or what you do to make it a reality any different. It’s just a smaller, more personal, scale. You have to align your goals with your enduring principles and your vision to achieve an outcome that matters.

When your goals aren’t in alignment with your vision, you can still hit them

As I was saying before, if you’re a high achiever and you have all of the right things in place, you can hit almost any goal. Let’s take an example of one such high achiever to better understand the impacts. Years ago I was working with a woman who was still getting her feet underneath her in her role. She was smart as a whip and had the capacity to be great in the role she was in, but it was taking a little time to round out of the skills needed. As she grew more comfortable and more confident, she really started to make a positive impact. She was able to influence others and build strong relationships. She was able to focus on her team more than she had when she was first promoted.

What was the end goal?

I asked her once what the end goal was. Was this a role she planned to stay in for the long term? She said, Well I don’t know, but I think so! I’d like to retire my husband and I think I can do that here. I’m finally able to spend time with my kids and do the work I love. Not long after, she shared in confidence that her boss was recommending another promotion. I was excited for her, it’s always a great compliment when someone says you’d be a great fit for another, bigger, role. After we talked about what that would mean a little bit I asked if this changed her plan at all. Was the current role no longer the long-term plan? She furrowed her brow and said, I’d make more money in the other position I imagine. My boss said it’s the next step. There’s a certain air that comes with being in that role. I commented on the money allowing her to retire her husband earlier which made her face light up. Then I asked if it would cause her to work more hours. There is always a tradeoff, she said.

From that moment there was a renewed focus for her. She was going to get that promotion. You could see it in her decision making, the amount of time she spent at work, and the way she interacted with her team. She stopped aligning herself with the impact she wanted to make and having boundaries at work. Her alignment was now with being promoted at all costs. It certainly paid off too. Within a year she had achieved her promotion.

You would expect excitement right?

You might, but you’d be wrong. I congratulated her on the promotion and asked how it was going. She nearly broke into tears. I’m not sure. Well, that was an understatement. She was absolutely sure how it was going, and it was terrible. She’d lost respect of those who had worked with her. This new achievement was unfulfilling and stressful. At this point, she didn’t even know why she’d worked for that promotion. She just thought that’s what you’re supposed to do. Now, here she was, about 5 minutes in and already feeling like a failure.

How will you feel?

So, it’s still early, you’re probably still working toward that goal you set a few weeks ago. How will you feel when it’s done? Will you be joyful? Will you be thrilled you put the effort toward it? Are you going to be courageous and ready for the next challenge? Or will you feel like my co-worker? Will you have that hollow and unfulfilled stress of hitting a goal that was never part of your plan? Will you be confused and flustered striving for that next challenge because you think that’s the way to scratch that itch.

Know what, you’ll probably hit that next milestone too. Without the alignment to the vision, you might check every box in their list and never be able to enjoy it or be effective long term. The weight loss won’t stick. You won’t be great in the job. You’ll spend all the money you saved up. All because that goal wasn’t in alignment with your vision, those enduring principles you know to be true for you.

How do I make sure my goals and vision are in alignment?

When you start with a vision, you know why you’re working toward it. You can put all of the structure, work, and goal setting standards behind it. Then you’ll achieve the goal, be one step closer to the vision, and feel the feelings you wanted to have. You’ll even feel joyful in the hard times, because you know where it is all going. This is true of goals big and small. It would be true for my friend, true for you, and true for Dr. King as he went through all of the trials and tribulations of his work.

Because Dr. King knew that when you’re working toward a vision, even the painful times are worth moving forward in. That is why he concluded one of his famous speeches with this Langston Hughes quote: “If you can’t fly, run, if you can’t run, walk. If you can’t walk, crawl, but by all means, keep moving!”

Let me help you find your vision friend. Sign up for the Aligned Ambitions workshop here. Set your enduring principles and vision for your life so that all of your goals can line up behind it creating the beautiful dream you have for your life.