How to Advocate for Yourself at Work

Self-advocacy is taking initiative to communicate what you need and want. All too often people don’t take the time or initiative to simply ask for what they want and need. This is true for both men and women, but it seems to be more so women in the workplace who don’t advocate for themselves. We have a belief that if we ask for what we want we are somehow putting a hardship on other people. When that couldn’t be further from the truth. Knowing what you need and asking for it can make you a better employee, leader, and co-worker and will make you happier while you do it.

When you don’t know what will make you happy and more productive, or when you know and don’t share it, you’re actually doing a disservice to yourself and those you work with. Don’t believe me? Let’s take a look at some examples.

What does self-advocacy look like?

Years ago I was in transition from one very full and stressful job to another. The new job would have more responsibilities and likely more stress I thought. I was already working nights and weekends in my current role. Putting in many hours and working in odd ways that I’m sure other mothers can relate to. I’d take my laptop to the ‘mother’s room’ while I pumped. I carried files with me home to read when I got up during the night. My brain was filled with how to work through different projects and situations while I cooked dinner, folded clothes, and washed dishes. I needed to make a change when I took on this new role or I’d drown.

I needed to set boundaries at work

My first step was to determine what I needed to be successful at home and at work. I wanted to be impactful and successful, without feeling like I had to work all the time. There had to be a way to be available for emergencies without having work run through my head constantly. I wanted to be present with my babies and my husband and have time to take care of myself without feeling like I was taking time away from work or my family. Right out of the gate in this new job, setting boundaries and advocating for myself for the first time, it was pretty clear cut.

I decided that I would end work by four pm at least 4 days a week. I’d take my lunch break as time for me at least 3 days a week. My laptop wouldn’t come out at home more than twice a week. There were built in buffers (like the fact that I’d let myself work through lunch twice a week) that helped me stay on track without feeling too restricted. Then, I had to communicate this to my boss.

My boss worked long hours, always worked through lunch, and would be emailing and instant messaging every weekend and on holidays. The thought of telling him that I’d be working during work hours only the majority of the time was intimidating. During my next 1:1 I explained my priorities, what was going well and what challenges I was facing. I then explained that to hit those goals I needed better balance for my family, my health, and my work. He was concerned about my lack of availability and I assured him we could discuss if he had a concern.

More examples of advocating for yourself at work

In my example, I was advocating for a lifestyle and balance that I was craving. I advocated for myself in advance, coming in and tying my goals to the things I was advocating for. For others, you may be looking for a more tangible requests that you can’t just claim the way I could claim my time.

One client I worked with knew that she was worth more money than her salary would indicate. There were regular annual performance reviews and raises associated with them, but they weren’t going to get her where she wanted to be any time soon. So, she got strategic in how she advocated for herself. During her 1:1 meeting with her manager she clearly articulated what she wanted to make and asked what it would take to get there. Each time they discussed it she came with a fresh list of what she had achieved and how it contributed to the department and company success. Her boss said they’d never heard of someone getting a raise mid-term before. She wasn’t sure if she could even give a raise let alone one of this amount.

Does advocating for yourself work?

Advocating for yourself is rarely a once and done type of work. Advocacy is a consistent action rather than a onetime declaration. Spoiler alert, in neither example did the boss simply accept the initial conversation and move forward in full support.

In my example, I needed to first respect my own boundaries. I committed to what I would and wouldn’t accept from other’s priorities. When someone asked me to take on last minute work that didn’t align with my top priorities, I recommended an alternative due date. Other times I brought the competing priority to my boss. We discussed if it should be reprioritized or if this would be a day I’d work through lunch to knock it out. I’m not going to say I’ve been perfect in this. I already had bad habits I am still working against. Having those conversations clearly and going back to my commitments and how it would make me more productive in the end was important for me and those I was working with.

For the woman I was working with on increasing her pay, it was an even bigger pay off. (pun totally intended) She was incredibly focused on her goal to increase her pay and addressed it in a collaborative and confident manner. When her boss wasn’t sure of the parameters of giving raises, this woman asked if the boss would like to find out from HR or if she should explore it herself and get back to her. When they found out it was uncommon but possible, the conversation turned back to what goals would be worth this increase? The client worked diligently on those goals and communicated them frequently to her boss. Within a matter of months she had secured a 15% raise.

How to advocate for yourself

Know what to advocate for

Knowing what to advocate for yourself is one of those simple questions that is difficult to answer. Advocate for what will make you the best version of you at work and outside of it. That will be different for everyone. For me, it was boundaries and a window for a long time. I wanted the ability to see the sun, rain, clouds, and snow. It was really easy for me to get lost in work so I had to advocate for ways to disconnect. Another important area I’ve advocated for myself for was participation in setting the strategy.

For lots of people it is money, time off, or flexible work schedules. For other’s its access to people or events. You’ll notice that in my examples, both my client and I had very different ideas of what we needed to be successful. It could be any of those things for you, and likely more. The important thing is to understand what will make you the best version of you.

Align it with the goals of the organization

You advocate for things that will help you be a better version of yourself at work and at home. Because of that, it’s important to tie what you’re doing to the goals of the organization. This will help you overcome objections, set key objectives for yourself if you don’t already have them, and help you both measure progress. This doesn’t always have to be that you’ll increase productivity or reduce waste. In my example my case was essentially that I could work less and produce the same quality of work if we agreed on what was priority. I set the terms. My client however, proposed the terms. She posed the question of what would be worth this raise to her boss. In both instances it was a back-and-forth conversation of what quality looked like to achieve the outcome we were advocating for.

Communicate consistently with the person who can deliver

Advocating for yourself cannot be set it and forget it work. You need to be in consistent communication about status and results. If you’re doing the work and not discussing it you run the risk of them forgetting or not connecting the work you’re doing to the result you’re looking for. Or, worse yet, you lose focus on what you’re working toward and don’t meet the objectives you set. This not only will have you lose out on what you were advocating for in the first place but you’ll lose credibility for next time.

Also note, the communication needs to be with the person who can deliver on what you’re advocating for. If you’re telling your co-worker everything you’re doing, you’ll likely get hit the objective and not get what you were working toward. If you communicate with your supervisor and it is actually their boss who needs to deliver, or another department, the same is potentially true. You need to be sure the person who can take action and follow through is aware and on board with your plan.

Still not sure you can advocate for yourself?

You can do this. It will feel awkward at first but it is a worthy skill of influence, sales, and negotiation. Click here to go to the YouTube channel and get the script I would use to advocate for yourself. You can learn to set the stage, follow up, and deliver on what you’ve executed. Think you’re ready to use this self-advocacy and communication to take you to the next step? Click here to get your guide specifically created to help you advocate for the next right step for you.